10 Things Everyone Hates About Addiction

Anyone who has an addict in their life will agree that there are times when you’ll feel hate.  It’s not hatred for the addict, though. Instead, it’s a combination of frustration, confusion, and loathing brought on by the person’s addiction.  The things everyone hates about addiction are not always easy to sort out or understand.

It’s not easy to watch a loved one turn into someone you hardly recognize anymore.  Whether the addict in your life is a spouse, child, relative, or friend, there will be days when you feel overlooked, alone, and helpless. Don’t worry. You’re not alone.

Why People Hate Addiction

Some addicts mistakenly believe that they are only hurting themselves. They don’t see or are too involved with their own issues to recognize that their family members are suffering.  For that reason, we’ve compiled a list of 10 things everyone hates about addiction.

You may be having some of these thoughts about the addict in your life:

• He or she chooses alcohol or drugs over you.

Your friend or loved one fails to show up for dinner or the movie you planned to attend.  Or, they show up, but they’re high or drunk. It’s probably not the first time, and most likely won’t be the last.

• You can no longer trust that they are sober as they claim to be.

Time after time, you’re told that your friend or loved one has gotten sober, only to discover that they either lied or relapsed.  You’re disappointed because you really wanted to believe things had changed. It takes time, but you eventually learn to put more faith in the person’s actions than their words.

• A family member or friend enables the addict.

It’s not easy to tell someone you love that you will no longer provide for them if they continue the drug or alcohol use.  Many parents and spouses are enabling the addict in their lives in this way. They believe the promises, give them another chance, and the cycle never ends.

• Sometimes you love and hate the addict.

After being repeatedly let down, lied to, manipulated, stolen from, and hurt, it’s understandable that you are angry.  Over time, the anger festers and feels like hate. You don’t want to see the person or even hear his or her name.

• You feel terrible about cutting the person out of your life.

If you’ve had to resort to this tactic, you will feel awful and guilty and may second guess your decision.  But, you are important, too. You have to look out for your best interest. Sadly, far too many people find that everything they loved about their life is in shambles because of a loved one’s addiction.

• You always worry about receiving “that phone call.”

You’ve heard the statistics about overdoses or accidents that happen because of addiction.  So, every time the phone rings, you wonder if it’s going to be bad news. Did your loved one die in some terrible way because of their drug use?  Or, are they in jail? The anxiety takes a toll on you after a while.

• You miss the person your friend or loved one used to be.

Drug or alcohol abuse can change a person dramatically.  A once bubbling personality can become one of despair.  The once attentive and loving person you knew is now distant and neglectful.

• You feel guilty about any successes in your life.

If your addicted loved one is struggling with the effects of addiction, it’s hard not to feel guilty about having a successful, happy life.  You don’t want to appear boastful and proud to one whose life is falling apart. So, you downplay your success and are robbed of your right to brag a little.

• People think you’re an addict, too.

Humans tend to be judgemental, especially when it comes to addiction.  It’s not unusual for them to assume that if one family member is addicted, the others are addicts, also. This is just one more way that the addict spreads pain and suffering to their spouses or children.

• You feel like no one understands what you’re dealing with.

Most of the time, you don’t want to talk to anyone about your situation with the addict.  You’re afraid you’ll be judged or pitied, and that no one would truly understand what you’re going through.  You often feel isolated and helpless.

These are some of the most common things everyone hates about addiction.  No one wants to deal with these feelings, but they are forced to endure them because of an addict in their life.  The good news is, there are many support groups and counseling available to help you learn how to cope with the things peveryone hates about addiction.

Finding Help for the Addict in Your Life

For more information about addiction or treatment programs for your friend or loved one, contact us today.  One of our representatives will be happy to answer your questions.

If you’re interested in treatment, we can conduct a confidential assessment and recommend a program that is right for your situation.  We understand the things everyone hates about addiction and can help addicts and their families overcome these obstacles.

Sources:

asam.org – Definition of Addiction

ncbi.nlm.nih.gov – Chapter 2 Impact of Substance Abuse on Families